Video and transcribe available below

Are your emails friendly?

Hey folks, Dr Ro here. I hope you are well. I have a question mark around a subject which I think is worth tackling at the moment with regards to communication, general communication in writing as opposed to verbal communication. 

The question is how are your emails? Are they friendly? 

The ones that you are receiving from people, but how are the emails you’re putting out?

I’m sure this message I’m going to share with you might provoke some reaction in certain people, but I want to share it as what I’m noticing a lot of people when they’re sending emails they’re very abrupt at the moment, not everybody’s, but certain people I’m dealing with and have also seen in it other people’s correspondence that they received. 

So instead it’s like hi and then the person’s name, it’s just a person’s name and it is signed off by the other person’s name that they’re sending which is fine depending on personality type.

One of the things that we do on the communications program is talk about four different archetypes, four different personality types and then four different delivery styles. A delivery style can be applied both in an email as well as verbally as well. 

A lot of people don’t actually appreciate this. 

For me if I see a message from someone I’ve known for a while and it is like a name, message and then signed off by somebody that doesn’t actually resonate particularly well with me. I’ve taken the time over the years to just at least open with something as a warming gesture. 

I want to share a couple of things you can consider. What I teach when it comes to communication is so important to develop connections as if you can’t connect with somebody, then what happens is you’re not going to be able to influence them. 

But equally you might piss them off to start with, so you’ve created a wall before you’ve got any further and that internal reaction can create any number of responses from people. 

So think carefully about how you maintain that connection. Be personable, for the sake of what one line hope all is well with you, particularly in the current climate as well. What does it take when you’re drafting an email to just say not John this is the information requested, Rohan. Maybe for a driver personality they’re okay to receive that, but if I were to say, hi John Hope all is well with you and your family you’ve requested information here it is below. Let me know if there’s anything I can help you with sign kind regards or many thanks Ro. 

Who agrees that’s a totally different feeling from the person receiving it? 

It takes an extra 30 seconds to do that, and I think we forget to do that because we try to knock out stuff quickly and that’s what I read when I see an email from certain personalities, I get I think I know this person’s got a lot on their plates. They’re probably assuming I’m going to receive it the same way that also depends on the state of mind that I’m. 

When you receive an email from someone and you’ve had a tough morning or you had a fallout with somebody you had a disagreement and then you open up your emails and then you see correspondence from somebody else, even though they may not have the intention at that moment to piss you off just by the very fact they sent the message and it hasn’t got a little bit of a softening feeling to it, you bring your frustrated energy to the table to receive that email you may send them something back. 

Now we’ve got no tonality, no physiology, which are two major forms of communication, we’ve just got words and those words can be interpreted in any number of ways. It’s so important to maintain rapport. That’s the last thing I want to share with you here. Do something in your communication or correspondence to make it slightly personable and at the same time it’s really important to keep that rapport going. 

If you have rapport with somebody already maintaining that rapport and you do it by making a soft connection, make it slightly personable, it doesn’t take much to do that just a slight gesture of interest in that person’s life as opposed to boom, this is what we’re at. 

For any extreme drivers they’ll be like I don’t need to know this stuff I’m just going to send my messages out and that’s fine, and nine times out of 10, with the people you are dealing with if they know that’s how you are, then they may accept that that is who you are. 

But what about people that don’t know you as well and you send a message like this to? 

What reaction does that create and what perception do you want people to have of you?

I’ll see you all soon have a great day.

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