Hey it’s Dr Ro I hope you’re well.
The subject’s fear and I want to tackle this question going on in people’s head about the fear holding them back and I’m seeing a lot of it right now in the marketplace.
I’m teaching people investing in property, but the reality is fear is showing up in so many different dimensions in people’s lives.
I think the backdrop of this is Covid, recession, redundancies, divorce rates increasing, people feeling extremely vulnerable, threat of potential loss of income in the next six to 12 months, companies potentially collapsing.
When you have a massive backdrop of that type of fear plus a lot of the propaganda that has been out there about Covid, et cetera, in whatever context it’s been put out it has created this reactionary fear in people.
So what I’m finding is that’s been translated across into decisions that people make about their financial future. Whether it’s to do business, starting a business, looking at an opportunity to invest in themselves, doing training programs, coaching, mentor, whatever it is, it’s like oh my gosh. I want to give you a couple considerations if you’re in the headspace or your partners in the headspace you might want to show them.
This is a genuine message for anyone, really anyone in the situation if you’re feeling fear, the first thing to consider is fear of what?
What is exactly that you are fearful of?
Fear is a liar.
Fear is one of the biggest liars out there. It will often throw stuff at us that gets us questioning and most people are afraid of something that isn’t even tangible. They’re thinking about it, they miss breakfast, dinner, they get distressed, they disconnect from people, they have nightmares about it, they can’t sleep about something that may or may not have a future. So the first thing is exactly what are you afraid of? Is it fear of rejection, fear of losing money, something not working out? You’ve got to be really, really very, very clear.
Question one is fear of what?
Write it down in the words that are coming through. I think this is one of the most powerful processes I take people through, write word for word. We need to be specific. What is it you’re afraid of? If I invest this in return for money I might look stupid to people, we need to capture that out then we zone and say okay, apart from that, what else are you afraid of?
Apart from that, what else are you afraid of? This. Then we get down to the hub of that and you say that’s the problem there at which point, having done that, I’ll throw a counter question and you might want to consider this as a self-reflective question. If you don’t do this, if you don’t make this investment in yourself, if you don’t do this course or buy this business or investment property, if you don’t do this, you’ll stay on the same trajectory.
Going in this direction and you saw an opportunity someone offered you an opportunity, you are looking for an opportunity if you don’t take that opportunity and change direction and go there, which is where you want to get to and you carry on going down this route here what are the consequences? Why is it you start looking over there? Is there something that you’re not happy about here? Why, why, why, why, why? Why did you look over there?
If you don’t go over there and take that on, learn this or invest in yourself or buy whatever it is, if you don’t do that bang, bang, bang, you’ll head down the same road and that same road may not be the road you want to be on. It’s the consequence conversation we have to have.
Fear of that versus the benefits of that scenario. Now we say If I do that what are the benefits? Life changes, more money or income or time with my family, better lifestyle, time freedom, big house, travel more, give money to charity, there is something there that has huge benefits.
It could just be yourself with confidence being able to be creative, starting to pursue a passion and purpose so you go in that direction there as that is the reason that you really want to change and grow. You’ve got to weigh up if I carry on. Do I want to go down there?
Why is it so appealing?
Because of this, this, this. We make the reason so big so the problem, the fear blocking us is tiny and we go right there is the fear there is the reason. And remember, if the fear is this big, I’ve got to make the reason that big. When I look at all the benefits I say where the fear is, it’s all the way down there. But if all I’ve got is the fear to focus on that is the thing that’s massive. We’ve got to change the way we perceive it, nothing has meaning apart from the meaning that you give it.
So, give it a different meaning and ask these hard questions. What are you afraid of? Write it down and look at it and ask yourself the question: how can I overcome it? Start looking at people around you that can support you. Who’s been through it? How did they overcome it, and what if I don’t do this, I carry down the same route?
But if I do make a change what are the benefits, how can I get there and who and what do I need to have around me in order to make this happen?